Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas at my place

Before I go any further, let me ask this of you: Are you the people who open up presents on Christmas Eve? Because if so, I'm not sure we can truly be friends. This unnatural, unholy, disgusting practice needs to be legislated out of existence.

Let me get this straight: you let the kids open their presents on Christmas Eve, they play with their new toys for a little while, and then you send them to bed? What kind of torture is that? When they wake up the next morning, there's nothing to look forward to! The toys are already yesterday's news. The rest of the holiday is spent wishing you got something else.

No, presents should be opened on Christmas morning. It teaches kids patience. It gives them something to look forward to. And they have a whole day to play.

So, if you're among those who open on Christmas Eve, stop it. Show a little restraint this year. Wait until morning.

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When I blogged at 360, I often decried the Christmas card thing. We sent out 30-40 every year, and got maybe 10 back. This year, I said screw it, I'm not sending any. I got two: one from the ex-, and one from her sister.

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When we moved to Ohio, we were far and gone from family. So, we had to make our own holidays special. I tried to create a new tradition: finding a cheap Chinese buffet for dinner on Christmas Eve.

Okay, so maybe it's not the greatest tradition, but it's something. The ex- wasn't too keen on it either, but she humored me the last two years.

This year, she's gone, and I'm by myself, but I'm going to look for a cheap Chinese buffet on my way to work. Yeah, I volunteered for the overnight shift, so those with families could spend time with their loved ones. Noble, huh?

It's no big deal. I've worked plenty of overnights on Christmas in the past, driving 3-4 hours after my shift to get home for the family's event.

But, probably the worst Christmas I ever had, (and I don't tell you this to evoke sympathy, just to give Renee something to read.), was in 2000. I was working a temp job at the Post Office. Oh yeah, the USPS never sleeps. It sleepwalks sometimes, but never sleeps.

My shift ended at about midnight, and I went outside to find my car battery dead. (It was an ongoing problem, since I didn't have money to buy a new one.) I found someone to give me a jumpstart, drove home, left the engine running, as I went in to collect presents, and then hit the road for a 3-hour drive to see my parents and siblings.

I got there around 3:30 or so, hoping beyond hope that they would still be up, drinking, laughing and playing Trivial Pursuit. Nope. The house was dark. And as I crept in, my only wish was to take a quick shower before hitting the sack. But Mom heard me come in, and hustled me off to bed, not wanting me to wake any of the nephews. (And I was filthy. My job at the post office was not the cleanest. We basically loaded and unloaded semis filled with third class mail.)

Three and a half hours later, the kids were up, and so was everyone else. We did the presents thing, the dinner thing, I got a quick nap, and then, it was back to Omaha and work. (Yes, junk mail moves across the country, every day.)

Dad came out, and jumpstarted the car, and off I went.

As I'm flying down the Interstate at 80mph, in the left lane, some bozo decides to change lanes without looking. I slam on the brakes, and swerve a bit, and suddenly, I'm doing 360 degree turns. At 75mph. I did about two complete circles before going nosefirst into the snowcovered ditch.

And the bastard who cut me off? Didn't even stop.

Other people did. They helped push me out, gave me another jump start, and sent me on my way again. (Whereever you are, Colorado volunteer firefighters, thank you!)

So, I was only a hour late for a job I didn't really care for, and would lose a week later, once the holiday rush was over.

What did I get for Christmas that year? I think I got a sweater. I don't even remember.

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So, what am I doing this year? Besides waiting to go to work: I cleaned house while listening to last week's show from The Artist D. If you'll check her schedule, you'll find she's got a whole slate of entertainment planned for the holiday. Tune in!

4 comments:

Vulnavia Morbius said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Vulnavia Morbius said...

Let's try this again without the spelling errors:

Unfortunately--or maybe fortunately for her--Renee is spending her Christmas with her sisters. She looks just like them, so it will be interesting to see the photographs.

Me? I'm spending Christmas day with Felicia's family, who I tolerate okay. But they don't know how to cook, which is a grievous failing. I mean, we've invited her family members to our house many times and they've never accepted, even though I DO know how to cook. Philistines. Feh. It's going to be a long day.

Le visage d'avril said...

As kids we got to open one Christmas eve. The rest was the next day.

My kids had to wait till Christmas Day!

Renee said...

My Christmas is over, for the most part. And yes, we let the kids open their presents on Christmas Eve...every year. It's okay though; they're incredibly spoiled by their grandparents and always have a second heaping load of presents to open on the day itself.

My worst Christmas was perhaps five years ago. My brother-in-law got all sorts of things he considered to be fantastic; toolchests and power tools and all that kind of stuff. I got a bag of Hershey's chocolates. Oh trust me, I didn't want the tools, and my parents balanced the gift-giving out with the requisite amount of cash, but even so, I was deeply bothered. It was just so blatantly obvious at that point that my parents didn't know me at all; and it wasn't so much about the gift-giving as the laughter and joy and peripheral stuff associated with it. My sister's husband is someone that could have easily been my parents' child. Me...I was so alien to them they couldn't think of even a single thing I might like.

Fortunately, that doesn't seem to be a problem any more.